The Journey Begins

Glittering Images. The words were constantly interrupting my thoughts. What is it that God was trying to tell me? I knew it was at the core of this book, the deep visceral understanding I had of identity that still was struggling to surface. Glittering Images.

One early morning I realized that my life had too often been a pursuit of glittering images rather than my true identity. Glittering images is the direct antithesis to True Identity. There was a war all of my life to uncover the true Angela buried under the glittering images of expectations and performance. What is pleasing to man is rarely pleasing to God. He had conceived of me back when he created woman, with that same pronouncement of “This is good”.  Angela was conceived in God’s heart and planned for this time to be in this world called earth. He saw something in me that glittered like gold, that was My Shine, and he was determined to release the fullness of Me into the world he had planned for me. Through the parents and family he chose for me. Through the family I would have. Through the friends and loved ones that would enter my path. He knew I would get buried under Glittering Images that would try to cover and kill the true image I was created to be – The reflection of Christ. We are meant to look in the mirror each day and see Christ. Each of us carries a part of the heart of Jesus, a piece of the whole, and that piece is ours to carry into eternity. Unfortunately, we often prefer someone else’s piece to our own, their glittering image to our own destiny and we fall prey to being an appearance of the real thing.

No more, I cried that morning. I am finished. No matter what I will allow the true identity of who you saw that moment of creation when you said, Let there be Angela, and you looked at me and said, this is Good. I shed the glittering image I was wearing and knew that the answer was to be who I am at this moment in time. I rest in the truth that I am far from perfected, and I have a limited lens. I will seek daily to receive your lens, not only for seeing myself truly as I am, but others as you see them. It is a solemn journey that brings great joy to my heart.

Rock on, Angela. Rock on.

Taking Care of Me

We women are givers and nurturers by nature, aren’t we?  There is some part of our identity that says we are not allowed to take care of ourselves because there are so many needs out there that require our constant presence.

Add to that the rhetoric we learn at home, church, and family. A stay at home Mom is riduculed when her husband comes home to messy floors and sinks full of dishes, wondering what has she done all day? The working Mom is expected to keep up the house and all the needs of the family as well as work full time, because those are the chores of women. Or maybe you just watched your Mom sacrifice herself for the sake of her husband needing to be the breadwinner so she could serve  his needs properly.

Whatever the source of your messages, the reality is we have not been taught to take a break, rest, take care of ourselves. Some of us hoped that when our kids were grown, they would take care of us. Or when the kids were gone, our husbands would. It can be a bit of a shock when they just don’t know how because we never declared we needed anything. How many divorces have you seen occur after the kids left home and the husband and wife looked at each other with dismay – who are you?

I love the movie, Fried Green Tomatoes. I love Evelyn, played by Kathy Bates, as she declares her independence by tearing down walls in the house, her husband oblivious as long as he  had his beer and dinner ready. You watch her blossom into a real person who starts doing what pleases her, and, in  miraculous  Hollywood predictability, her husband finally sees the light. The truth is, she needed to show him the light.

Here is the light I want to shine on you this day. Remember every day the admonition of the flight attendants in the airplane telling  you that when the oxygen mask drops down, make sure you inhale first before putting the mask on the child or elderly adult next to you. The message is, you are no good to them dead!

How do you fill up your oxygen? Can you breath hope into someone else if you have none? Can you pour out if you are empty? Where is the other side of the nursery rhyme, “I’m a little teapot, short and stout, just tip me over and pour me out.” How about “I’m a little teapot empty and dry, just fill me up and I will fly.”

Women need women. Men fill only one part of your tank. Women who love and cherish you are out there. Sometimes you just can’t see them, or they are only people who have been receiving from you for so long, they are sure you are strong enough to handle everything! Such a lie! And how hard is it to go to those people with your problems? How many have just shrugged their shoulders and walked away saying, that’s what I have YOU for!

Crocadile Dundee makes a classic statement in the  movie of the same name. “Hasn’t she got any mates?” he asks, after Sue explains to him what a psychiatrist is. Mates indeed. America is a culture where it seems we have to pay for a Mate to talk to.

I was given an assignment years ago when I was meeting with my expensive Mate.  She said to find 4-5 women in my circle to befriend and spend time with. I was sure there were none. My counselor said that I would be surprised how close they were if I just looked past the needy ones. She was right. I just hadn’t recognized the need, nor considered they too might need a mate as well. My horizons expanded. Of course it meant a time of letting go of those I had called friends who were actually just sucking me dry. Those I kept to a minimum, making sure that first I filled my tank before pouring out.

It is a work in progress. I fall prey to the empty cup syndrome off and on and have to step back to a place of R & R (Rest and Recuperation) for a season to get replenished.

The principle of rest is one found in the Bible. God rested on the seventh day. He offers us a model for rest. We all need a Seventh Day in our lives. For some it may only be an hour or two. Just see what happens when you look at that busy calendar and mark off in bright red, “ME TIME”. It is a gift from God to you if you are willing to receive it.






First blog post

I wrote a book, soon to be published, and then thought perhaps I should do a blog, and a web page, in that order.

Hi. This is Angela Joy. I am new to this so please be patient. I am kind of doing this backward. I wrote a book, soon to be published, and then thought perhaps I should do a blog and a web page. If you read my book, that about fits with my style anyway. I back myself into a lot of siturations. but God…..

Yes this is about but God…. who He shows up to be in the times when you are pretty sure He doesn’t exist. Or care. Or even remember you. But He does. Exist. and care. and remember. He created me. it’s that simple. And He cares a great deal about his creation. That would be me. And He cares the same for you.

I am no one more special than you. And I am just as special as you. We are His favorites. So I wanted my written words to express myself and perhaps speak into things in your life that have been hard to explain or understand. If you only knew we are all in this together.

Each moment of each day is a gift. You are a gift. What you have been given is meant to be given back. I hope you will. We will all be the better for it.